Past and Present (part 1)

It's been said that humans are creatures of habit for many years, many behavioural scientist have studied the causes of various habits and their consequences. In my own experiences I have found that these habits span many factors and situations, leading to multiple outcomes and complex sub situations. As a counsellor and mentor the majority of these experiences has been circled around social relationships of many varieties and their impact of individuals groups and teams. I've been continually amazed at the implications of relationships even in my own experiences, they have lead to life altering decisions and ultimately determine how far we go in life. I firmly believe that they are the building blocks of mankind and if not correctly harnessed can lead to extreme consequences.



As a man of christian faith the first relationship we are taught to foster is with Jesus Christ, and even though many may argue this is questionable due to multiple religions and beliefs, we'll all just have to wait til judgment day to know that I'm right. No matter your beliefs however, you are taught that god comes first, no matter what you call him by. We were all made to understand that a sound relationship with him is fundamental to good living because he is our creator and this is what is due to him as our father. It's interesting that the concepts and methods identified for maintaining a healthy relationship with god are beyond coincidental to maintaining any kind of relationship with our family, peers and elders. Behavioural experts who have done years of studies have determined that multiple types of communication between individuals as one of the key components to maintaining healthy and vibrant relationships. Compared to what has been taught for millenia before the advancement of modern science, that when we talk to god it's not about praying for things we want, since the time of Abraham we have seen examples of communication with god spanning many topics from worship to knowledge seeking to counsellor and even the role of friend in comfort for losses endured. These were some of the concepts that we were taught to practice in relation to our master and creator, yet they are the same he outlined for us amongst our families, friends and even enemies. Two thousand plus years after the same concepts are rediscovered by man and yet still are lacking in even the most basic of relationships.



As a part time counsellor and mentor, I have often seen that a lack of communication as a fundamental weakness in many relationships. Intimate relationships in particular lack this element for multiple reasons with each bringing it's own element of surprise and consequence. The sessions I've held with some of my clients reveal that the breakdown begins during the courtship stage where truths are manipulated in the interest of physical attraction. This desire and manipulation combination is the first step to a fragile foundation which in turn degenerates into a crumbling relationships, immense heart break and ultimately an overdeveloped sense of hate and distrust towards either gender. This combination is fuelled by the rise in "casual sexual" relationships which mandate that the need for communication is limited to "time and place" with little else even considered. These are not considered relationships per say but more mutual agreements but often lead to improper intimacy foundations with limited established mental, emotional and sitmulative understanding. As these are the norm in relationships at many levels in society, it's easy to see why marriages hold so little respect.

Beware the Earthbound Immortal Cupiditas