Hypocrisy

It still amazes me the double standards we live by, the human flesh is truly fickle and unashamedly so at that. We always want it all but we're not willing to put in the work to have it all so we become a state of constant unfulfilled desire. I see you everyday and I gaze at your folly, you spend all your life tormenting those you consider lesser than you only to turn and complain that someone who has surpassed you now ridicules you leaving you bullied and tormented. When the tide turns on us very often we are feel wronged and aggrieved that someone could inflict pain on us but forget how much torment we have caused others.

Well here's a wake up call, do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Its an old saying that many of you do not live by. You walk around like the world doesn't have consequences and that all that you do will come back to you ten fold. You don't like it, too bad, it gets worst as your deeds go along the shit meter. For every person you discriminate against for being different you will be discriminated against for even saying different. You make a habit of abusing people, prepare to be beaten raped and left for dead. Don't complain that the world is unfair, you're unfair, you're the oppressor and the slave driver! How is the world unfair?? I can never understand how you who judge on appearance gets mad when your appearance is seen as inadequate. You go into depression and claim to be underappreciated but who do you appreciate? Who have you told you love them? Who have you comforted and cared for? Who have you spoken even a nice word to? You can't fake compassion, its a powerful emotion that only genuine people possess so if you find yourself unable to be genuinely concerned about even your family, its not the world that's at fault its you who choose to be bitter.

I feel sorry for your kind, bitter, uncompassionate, devoid of love and care, unable to cherish even the basics of affection. When I see how easily deterred you are from your goals I laugh because you made it your business to make others miserable. Meanwhile those you oppress will go on to be happy, they will rise and become what you most dream to be and leave you in a latrine of sorrow so deep that you will have no choice but to sit in a corner and shed tears that all that you crave will be forever out of your reach all because you choose to temporarily torment those around you in the name of feeling good about your own insecurities. How sad!!

From the Heart

It ought not to amaze me that I'm attracted to you, you represent what I like in a woman, daring, courageous and bold. Unafraid to show your colours while maintaining a stature of simplicity. Daily as I learn about you I realize your dreams, your fears and even your smiles and tears. There's a quiet noise that you make that sends adrenaline through my bones, it shows in your smile and in your eyes, burning with fire and filling me with a renewed hope that out there has hope and light.

From your playful grace to your gentle touch, you have my eyes locked on your every movement as I struggle for words to even begin to identify how I feel. Deep inside you awakened an old and long thought dead desire, a desire to give, a desire to love, a desire to be unconditional, a craving to be protective and yes an urge to be supportive. I look at you and I see trust, a stability of mind that oozes your confidence unassumingly. I have hope for you, hope that things will be ideal as we progress in this friendship, hope that my eyes aren't deceiving me and you are true, hope that all that I see in you is more than a mirage in the desert.

It's been a while now since we met, I haven't shown you all of me but I might jus yet. So much I long to let loose and show you but I have to be sure that you're perfectly genuine and true and not another tormentor sent to abuse my good nature. What gets me though is the connection we have, so quickly we share stories about each other without hesitation and yet still we're worlds apart as distant life forms living on separate planets at different ends of the galaxy. Maybe you are who I'm searching for or maybe you're another illusion meant to show me I'm getting closer, either which way I'm glad we met and I hope it gets even better from here……………………………

The Truth About You

Sadly I'm here thinking of the selfishness of some people, it's sad that you would spend time considering someone only to be discarded and later picked up at their convenience. The saying goes that when you see someone suffering it's best to leave them let them suffer because you very often do not know what sins such people are paying for.

Day by day I'm seeing that this world is filled with miserable, tortured, unloved people who deserve every bit of misery that they exist in. Long ago, a priest dived into a cold river in Germany to save the life of a drowning boy, that boy was Adolf Hitler. This alone is the extent to which attempting to undo God instilled punishments cause. When I look at you I see that potential to do so much good but deep down I know that you will do so much evil because you refuse to accept that life isn't your playground and people aren't your toys. Had I treated you with half the convenience you treat me with you would claim I'm no different than the rest. You would be bitter and upset that another man used you for your body and not appreciate you for who you are. The truth is though you are your body and only that because honestly you have nothing else to offer. There's no growth with you, there's no hope for better simply because you always do worst. It's a shame that your a mother with such a bright child who most likely won't see her potential because your focus is being the mom with the best body. Well you can't say I didn't try with you, know that I will be keeping my distance as more and more of the cruel fetishes you enjoy are revealed. I get that it turns you on to be conquered and that someone as passive as me won't ever be your so called conqueror and that's exactly why I'm at peace while torment reigns in your being.

To know peace is to know God but to not know God and expect peace is insanity of the highest order. Don't think for a second I don't know you encourage men to forsake the fellowship, a devil's prize in disguise out to destroy souls subtly. Fortunately I see you for who you are, unkind, unholy, uncaring, unfortunate, uncouth, unbelievable, unreliable, unambitious, untrustworthy devil of a demon. Get thee from hence in front of me devil! I see your true colours even behind the waterfall of tears. Its sad that you would think people will stay around you and support you being so false. I took my time to see the whole of you so that you would have no claim whatsoever to be anything other than a high maintenance slut.

At the very least I can say you have proven my point that those with the longest tears are pseudo apologetic and deservedly imprisoned in their misery. How sad………………………

How to be happy

It's a sad reality that nowadays people live in complete paranoia of inevitable infidelity. According to society every relationship will at some point in time have an outside party who you either accept or stay single and live in fear of. I do not subscribe to this theory so here are some tips to avoid this so called bound to horn syndrome:

1) be financially stable: It doesn't matter what they say, money is a part of today's stable home. Struggling with bills and even money to see a movie is a sure fire way to invite a cheater. Man or woman, people do not deal well with money problems so if you know you cannot manage that wallet stay single until you can.

2) compromise: I talk about this all the time, if you cannot meet someone halfway or find yourself always giving too much then that's called sacrifice. In the old days that feminists around the world dread so much men were always taught to ensure their women were well pleased and comfortable. In return women were taught by their mothers to always aim to please their men and make them comfortable, this balance was how many of the older generations stayed together longer. People who ask but never give are to be avoided at all costs!!! All they will do is drain you and leave you to die when they have taken all that they can get, with no remorse for you the idiot who didn't realize that those who don't invest in you are not to be close to you.

3) comprehension: I do not understand how people miss this but having been there myself I guess its easy to see. To know what you want you must understand yourself, whether you are an introvert or an abuser, understanding what makes you tick is crucial to knowing who you want in your life so in turn there will be clarity of personalities and not a clash of attitudes. Once you have understanding of you, next is to understand your significant other. We all have different traits and many quirks that make up who we are as an individual, understanding those differences is what builds unity and keeps relationships interesting. Its a known fact that every five years people change, what was fun now may not be later so always be willing to learn about your significant other.

4) communicate: there's just no easier way to be understood than to speak your mind. How hard is it to say that something bothers you or you have been offended by a remark or action or even just to say thank you? How hard is it that people do not do it?? Nowadays it's apparently a crime for a man to say that he has issues! He's seen as weak and lacking for having problems and speaking about then but this same society will turn and say men ought to speak up and not be so unemotional. The confusion is there because people do not speak up, too many people are afraid to say what's on their minds when this is in fact strength! True strength is not how well you hide your feelings, its how well you manage them. Speaking clearly on your position and stance is crucial to happiness, it removes doubt, fear and discomfort all in one. Want peace? Speak your mind and be clear about what you're saying and watch the weights lift off your chest.

5) understanding of self: sad to say many people do not know themselves at all. They live in a facade that they're a completely different person to what they actually portray. This pseudo life is how a lot of us are caught off guard because we fail to see that the world can see who we actually are and we're only fooling ourselves by pretending to be someone else. Learn yourself, learn your strengths and weaknesses, learn your traits and quirks and be honest about them all. Denial of who you are is what leads to your downfall because that information can easily be mastered by someone else who will use it to manipulate you leaving you in an illusionary bubble which then derails your personal lifestyle and leaves you complaining that the world is cruel and bitter. Wise up and realize that you are the master of you and only God is greater.

These aren't hard things to do just difficult to maintain because a lot of us choose to be bitter and unhappy for no reason. If you're one of those people stay far from me, I choose to be happy and wear a smile majority of the day.

Phase Two

Some days I sit and wonder at the cause of struggles and stress, the truth of the matter is that while struggles are caused by outside people at times, stress is always internal. I have yet to encounter any form of stress that wasn't created internally simply because stress is a reaction to the environment around me. Since this is the case it would only mean that after all the complaining and drama and counseling it still and always comes down to me.

The freedom of choice is what makes us responsible for ourselves to be honest. We decide the things that we do, the things we choose, the way we feel and especially the way we react to situations and others. After reevaluating the events of my life thus far I can only admit that 100% of all the drama I have been through is my fault. Even though there may have been an influence in my decisions they are still mine and that realization alone is enough to make me cry. Knowing that I have caused my own downfall and my own tribulations are facts I needed time to accept.

Its not easy to look in the mirror and see an enemy, its one thing to face threats out there but when the battle is within things change. You find your foundations ruined, your lifestyle changes and even your sight changes. It's unfair to yourself to not adapt though, failure to adapt results in extinction and in this world the extinct are nothing more than show pieces to conveniently gaze at so why put myself in such a position. Instead I've taken the good about me such as my smile, my generosity along with my subliminal charm, tactical foresight, etc and built on my weaknesses such as my need to exceed, arrogance of knowledge and my temper and molded them into a new and more powerful me. The results have been amazing, this new me is still a work in progress but a big upgrade from the older version. The really say youth is wasted on the young and lord knows my father made all the sense when he said that. For it isn't until we grow older do we truly value the actual preciousness of life itself such as love, loyalty, respect, honour, comradeship and trust. I know now that if these things aren't your priority you have a lot of maturing to do because these are the valuable that stand the test of time.

To me the key to it all is understanding, understanding of myself, those around me and where I stand with those around me and most importantly understanding of the God I serve. The peace I have inside is beyond measure about now, I see life from a whole new perspective with the full understanding that I am in full control of me and the decisions I make will ultimately determine who I am as a human being. The freedom of choice certainly is a blessing and a curse all at once.

Reality Check

The cruelty of humanity is not limited to class or race, rich or poor, old or young. It is all encompassing, wiping out species, habitats, even nations! As the days countdown closer to the end of things currently, I can't help but wonder at the signs that tell me the end is near. Its more than just the blood red moons or rise of false priests and leaders, its the behaviour of humans themselves that is most glaring. Men are lovers of themselves, even turning against women and children in the name of vice and vanity. Wars are now being fought in, out and around the home eroding the foundations of God fearing families with the promotion of promiscuity, infidelity, distrust, grudge, hatred and spite. These are the principles that we fight against and that doesn't even include greed, pride, vanity, idolatry, etc!

This isn't just about nation rising against nation, this is neighbours against neighbours, coworkers against coworkers, family against family! Its all about divide and conquer, a war strategy as old as time itself! Weakness is derived from confusion, chaos, mayhem and turbulence which distort the vision, emasculate the man and weaken to eventually destroy the foundations of morals, spiritual grounding, faith. Its become far too easy for us to worship self and not God, I even hear daily stories of people saying God is not with them?? Really?? God isn't with you?? Can't you see that you are the one who turned away your faith and handed it over to the devil who in turn gave u depression, stress, worries, fear, pride, insecurity and the list goes on! You traded your tiny bit of faith for all of those ailments? Well since you got so much for so little, tell me how's that working out?? How are your relationships with others? How well do you know yourself? How well do you get along with family? But we want peace right? We want peace peace without the king of peace? We want peace without the outpouring of love right? We want to begrudge all who hurt us but expect to be free of the prisons we built for ourselves right? Sure that makes all the sense in the world because the world is all you can see and seeing is believing so this is what you see and believe. Congratulations you have been easily deceived by the devil's greatest trick and believing that not only does he not exist but that all you have been warned about is fake and non existential! How sad for you!!

The Usurping Queen

When I met you there was nothing left, you were a bitter mess of broken dreams and dark secrets hidden from the world and shunned into silence. I took pity on you and slowly but surely nursed you back to health, I saw strength in you and helped you unleash and harness it so that you can stand as an equal and not be a trampled slave. I fought side by side with you as we overcame mountains and deep seas in record speed and with I measured success. How foolish was I as I only unleashed a beast that was supposed to be hidden.

Deceived by trickery, misled by your falling tears, I believed that you were much better than what you were getting. You were lost in the wilderness destined to be nothing more than a convenient selection for when the time is right. I turned you into a formidable force but you used that power to become a destructive megalomaniac. All that you touch cries and howls for pain, all life near you dies slowly and painfully with no hope of recovering. You're a murderer without compassion, without care, without substance and you never should have been let out of that cage. They really say when suffering occurs feel not for the victim for you do not know their identity. Now I see why he went through such lengths to degrade you for he saw the danger you posed. He saw the ruthless selfish detestably uncouth side of you that he has long feared. There's no contentment with you, no form of happiness because there's never enough, your appetite for destruction is insatiable and I in my foolish attempt at samaritan equity befriended you with the thoughts of your recovery from your past. Even now I see why you suffer the way you do, its u my conscience has warned about all this time. A wolf in sheep's clothing, a devil with a tiara and not a halo.

I only pray I am forgiven for my assistance in this mayhem. A man who I have never met will now have to forgive me of sins far greater than any in my life. After you there will be no more I swear, I won't support these atrocious acts of injustice in the name of foolish hope for inhumane humans.